Last week I took a holiday to France. Just before I left a colleague and I were debating the correct way to greet in work situations, for which we came up with no realistic resolution. France is way ahead of us in the greeting game. You greet someone with a kiss on each cheek and then continue to do exactly the same thing throughout the time you know them. Obviously there are some exceptions to this rule – such as the person becoming a boyfriend or girlfriend– but all in all, the system is straightforward and doesn’t vary. Whilst I was visiting Val Cenis I managed no awkward greetings with any French people, but one with an English person!
In England we are seriously lacking a greeting rule. We have all done it – leaned in for a kiss on the same side, poked someone in the stomach with an outstretched hand, taken the kiss cheek too far and hugged as well. We have managed to put a man on the moon and invent almost a whole language in anagrams, yet we haven’t established a method of greeting each other? OMG How?
I have just got to the age where this has become a problem. Through School and then University I got by merely nodding at a new arrival, or possibly waving depending on the distance – but usually a simple ‘hi’ did the trick.
Now I have entered the working world a nod or wave is simply not enough – enter the awkward-shuffle-greeting-mess. And it is now not only work, somehow this ineptitude to greet someone has leaked into my social life as well. My peer group seems to have taken the awkward shuffle greet from their new ‘real’ jobs, along with their first brand new suit, and bust it out on a Friday night. Enough is enough! I propose we start a British greeting rule!
This is what I propose:
Work – man & man – shake hands
Work – man & woman – shake hands with one cheek kiss
Friends – hug
Failing that maybe we should all revert back to the ‘I’m cool’ school nod?



